private contact (Foolish Mortals Archive)

[yourghosthost]

If you'd like to reach the Ghost Host, simply calling for him will do the trick. An omniscient presence, he'll be sure to appear before you as soon as he's available.

Comments are screened for privacy. A good Host never reveals his guest's secrets.

Comments

[folkscallmewander]

[Some time after meeting Mr. Host, comforting WALL-E, and seeing a dead body hanging from the ceiling, Wander is back to his usual Wander-y ways and walking around the first floor like nothing had happened.]

Hellooo. Mr. Host? Are you around?

[Do ghosts have offices? The attic that he mentioned might be it.] You got a bell or somethin' we can ring to talk to you?

[yourghosthost]

[and up from the floor he floats up, like a weirdo, dusting his jacket off.]

Simply requesting my presence will do for now.

[folkscallmewander]

Woah! [Wander stumbles backward and holds his arms out while he regains his balance.] Hah, you really surprised me there! I just have a couple questions for you.

[yourghosthost]

Do tell, good sir.

[he crosses his arms together, floating lazily.]

I'll answer what I can.

[folkscallmewander]

Alright, so, first. What kinda things do you like? You got anythin' that's good for arts and crafts? I can make you somethin' as a token of my appreciation.

Second, how're you holdin' up over there? Are all your ghost friends hangin' out in the attic while we're all down here? What're they like?

[He holds out two fingers and counts them as he goes through the question. A third finger pops up, but not without pause.]

...It might be a silly question but, is this my actual hat?

[yourghosthost]

...Well, for starters, I appreciate a fine beverage, good conversation and the occasional peace and quiet. That's not something mortals are necessarily capable of providing, though my body has been excellent company to me.

Many spirits occupy the mansion. But the attic is home to one that is more volatile than the others. I would advise not visiting it.

[he materializes a hi-c ecto cooler juicebox, pouring it into a wine glass as he speaks.]

I wouldn't know the answer to that last question.

[kindaruledatit]

[So this lovely... Thursday evening, Wendy's parked herself out in the stretching room. She's curious, very curious.]

...Hey, ghost dude. Are you there?

[she chooses, for the moment, to focus on the stretching painting of the woman balanced over quicksand.]

I mean, said you would be. You are the host and all... I guess.

[folkscallmewander]

[Wander nods, especially taking that juicebox-wineglass combo into account.]

Then, is there someone who knows? 'Cause see, this is a magic hat and it hasn't been workin' at all. I tried pullin' things outta it when I needed to, and. [A small uneasy noise.] I can't help but feel worried.

[yourghosthost]

I wasn't the one who brought you here, I can ask around, mind you. In that regard, I will note that virtually everyone who possesses some sort of supernatural ability along those lines is...noticeably lacking them.

[yourghosthost]

I would certainly hope so.

[he's casually chilling by his corpse, arm slung over the body's shoulder, with another holding a wine glass full of ecto cooler. he floats down to greet her.]

Is there something that you require, my dear?

[folkscallmewander]

Alright... [Wander's not alright.] My hat's still alive, right? Just not magic any more.

[yourghosthost]

I'd assume that would be the case, though I do apologize for not knowing more on the matter.

[folkscallmewander]

[Okay. Okay, okay, okay. His hat will be fine. He'll learn out who stole its magic. They'll be able to escape. Calm down.]

Oh, and just one more thing. [Wander's eyes point to the wine glass.] Do you only drink ghost juice, or does liquid non-ghost juice work?

[yourghosthost]

Both are fine. I can drink "non-ghost juice", as you put it, but I do also enjoy the occasional glass of ghoul-aid.

[folkscallmewander]

[Wander manages to smile. At least he knows what to give their host.] Heh. Ghoul-aid.

[He looks around the room as if he'll get another idea of what to ask. Nothing comes. Maybe he just needs to crawl into bed and relax. There's another day ahead of him.]

Well, thanks for takin' the time to talk to me, Ghostave. I really do appreciate gettin' to know our new neighbors.

[yourghosthost]

...Ghostave.

[kindaruledatit]

[she knows he's going to show up, but it still kind of unnerves her to see him hanging around his own body. Ugh, not a pretty sight.]

Yeah, I guess you could say that. I wanted to ask a couple questions.

[folkscallmewander]

Do you like that name?

[yourghosthost]

It's...a name.

[yourghosthost]

Ask away, my dear. I will answer what I am able to.

[kindaruledatit]

Alright. [She doesn't trust you, but whatever.]

First of all, what the heck if this place? Is it, like, your house, or something?

[yourghosthost]

Many names have come into usage for this place. The Gracey Estates. The Mystic Mansion. The Phantom Manor.

But the name that most prominently sticks to it is The Haunted Mansion, home for wayward spirits. It's never been under my ownership, if that's the question you're asking.

[kindaruledatit]

Really? Just kind of thought it was, since... y'know...

[Gestures]

It really fits you.

Sunday Week 2

[folkscallmewander]

[When Wander was boiling the peaches for peach lemonade, he made sure to make extra for the Ghost Host. What wasn't mixed into the lemonade had spices mixed into it - cinnamon and nutmeg and everything that would be fit for a new friend.

He empties a bottle of barbecue sauce into the sink and removes the label before pouring in the cooled drink. There. Even without wine bottles, he can make do. He takes the gift to his room, grabs a jar of the paper stars he made that week, and shouts at the ceiling which standing by his bed.]

Ghostave!

[yourghosthost]

I've been a resident for a great deal of time.

But the deed has never been under my name.